Unbelievable

There are so many ways to get a headache. Eat wrong, sleep wrong, exercise too little--or too much on a hot day, read too much or in bad light, cry too much, wear earphones too long, and now I've got another one--comb your hair the wrong way. After two hours I guess I need some aspirin.

Is As Pi Rip Sin Sip Sir Sap Rain Air Pin Snip Sprain Raisin Spin Spar Rap Asp Spa Pain -- That's what you can get out of the word "aspirin."

Only here they call it Acamol -- Am Cola Coal Clam Alamo Cam

You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance. Franklin Jones

What's another word for "Thesaurus?" Steven Wright

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not too sure.

I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done. Steven Wright

I hate housework! You make the beds, do the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again. Joan Rivers

Now that last one was SERIOUSLY FUNNY!!!